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Dear Agony Aunt
I am
totally in love with a boy. I like everything about him, but we went out before
and it didn't work.
My friend now wants him, but he has asked me back out. I
want him, too. I don't know whether to lose my friend, or my boyfriend.
I'm 14,
what should I do?
Torn
Dear Torn
The good
thing is you are only 14 years old. You will have many friends and boyfriends
throughout your life. However, that may not be too much comfort to you right
now. You did not say how long you went out with this boy, or why it did not
work out. You also did not say how close of a friendship you have with your
friend.
If this guy
was truly your boyfriend at one time, then it seems your friend would
understand if you and your boyfriend have some unfinished business, so to
speak. I would simply approach her truthfully and tell her what is going on. I
wouldn't blast her for liking him. If you have not told her your feelings for
this boy still remains, then she should not be condemned for liking him, also.
In fact, it does say much about your friendship that your friend feels she can
declare her feelings for your old boyfriend to you. You should not let her
ramble on about her feelings if you know deep down you and this boy are going
to be an item, again. It will only make her feel embarrassed when she discovers
what is going on.
This boy
has not turned his attention to your friend. He is showing an interest in
wanting to renew a relationship with you. Your friend cannot have a
relationship with someone unless they are interested, too. However, if you and your boyfriend do get
back together, you may want to refrain from going on about him and how great he
is. It will only cause your friend pain
if she truly likes this boy, too. You
shouldn't have to loose either your friend or your boyfriend if you play your
cards correctly. However, if your friend tells you it is either him or her,
then you have to decide what is more important to you. A boyfriend who may not be around in a years
time, or your friendship with this girl.
Best of
Luck
Agony Aunt
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